Apple †Strategic Management Essay

Apple designs Macs, the best personal computers in the world, along with OS X, iLife, iWork and professional software. Apple leads the digital music revolution with its iPods and iTunes online store. Apple has reinvented the mobile phone with its revolutionary iPhone and App Store, and is defining the future of mobile media and computing devices with iPad. Vision Statement Apple ignited the personal computer revolution in the 1970s with the Apple II and reinvented the personal computer in the 19805 with the Macintosh. Apple is committed to bringing the best personal computing experience to students, educators, creative professionals, and consumers around the world through its innovative hardware, software, and Internet offerings. â€Å"Man is the creator of change in this world. As such he should be above systems and structures, and not subordinate to them.† Mission Statement Apple Computer is committed to protecting the environment, health and safety of our employees, customers and the global communities ‘where we operate. We recognize that by integrating sound environmental, health and safety management practices into all aspects of our business, we can offer technologically innovative products and services while conserving and enhancing resources for future generations. Apple strives for continuous improvement in our environmental, health and safety management systems and in the environmental quality of our products, processes and services. Objective The Company is committed to bringing the best user experience to its customers through its innovative hardware, software, peripherals, and services. The Company’s business strategy leverages its unique ability to design and develop its own operating systems, hardware, application software, and services to provide its customers new products and solutions with superior ease-of-use, seamless integration, and innovative design COMPETITION When it comes to Apple‘s competitors I believe ther e is no one. The innovation,development and the trendsetting technique that Apple has introduced in electronics worldcannot be matched with any of other companies. If you do not agree with me I would suggest you to search for Apple‘s competitors on Google or anywhere else but you will hardly find any original Apple‘s competitor. According to Tim Bajarin, Apple‘s competition is coming from the likes of Amazon, Google, Real Networks, and to some degree, Sony, because of their strong investment in content. But I do not agree with his viewpoint. Products like iPad,iPhone, iPod and services like iTunes and Apple stores have no competition at all and most importantly Apple is not a company that satisfies customer needs but it manufactures those products that become customers need

Policy Analysis Paper: Mental Health Essay

Introduction: This paper will discuss the necessity for social policy change in regards to the mental health system (or lack thereof) within the United States as well as internationally. The need for reform is tantamount in order for marginalized groups with mental disabilities to function well-beyond their capacities. An analysis of policy is needed to better understand the challenges that face current social workers and mental health professionals at this time. Therefore, this paper will discuss eight articles that pertain to the social work school of thought, and will be utilized to a great degree in making an argument for social reform. The peer-reviewed, scholarly articles are presented and discussed to frame a basic foundation on what needs to be done, and if these changes are feasible in nature to our society. Since the topic is on Mental Health Policy, it is important to note any biases or hesitations that a social worker may have towards intellectual and mentally handicapped persons, and view this problem with an open mind free from negative beliefs. Looking at this in the broad sense, this is not just a financial problem, nor a personal problem, but rather, this is a societal problem. There are many different ways in which mental health disorders can be attributed to. Crime, drug addiction, and many other factors are linked to some mental health issues. Depression, which affects millions worldwide can be treated through cognitive behavioral therapy. The best way to treat this problem would be prevention, and that is something that the United States, and the world has been lacking for quite some time. It is important to discuss this issue and provide long-term answers now, lest we face more financial burden and social burdens due to our own ineptitude. See more: how to write an analysis paper on an article examples Literature Review: The first article that will be discussed for this analysis is titled Mental Health and Poverty in the Inner City. This piece of literature examines the correlation between the rise in urbanization and mental health problems (Anakwenze & Zuberi, 148, 2013). It is a fact that the number of people who live in urban populations steadily increased within the millennium and is projected to go up in the next decade (Anakwenze & Zuberi, 148, 2013). This article provides evidence linking the rise of the urban population to the growing number of mental health disorders within it. Living in a densely populated area can bring about many factors that can stimulate mental health problems. Noise, pollution, and lack of adequate green space are some of the problems that individuals face within cities (Anakwenze & Zuberi, 148, 2013). It is no wonder that mental health is of vital importance to the urban population, particularly the urban poor. Poverty is a strong characteristic of city life, and thus, it is necessary to see if there is causation between city-life and mental instabilities (Anakwenze & Zuberi, 148, 2013). The article argues that the relationship between an urban environment and mental health problems can be described as cyclical and non-linear (Anakwenze & Zuberi, 148, 2013). The cycle is reinforced through poverty and this can nurture mental illness if not properly taken care of. The authors challenge current mental health policy and advocate for a system that specializes in prevention and treatment across all populations (Anakwenze & Zuberi, 148, 2013). Crime, substance abuse, and other mechanisms that originate from urban environments can have a bi-directional relationship in regards to mental health and urbanization (Anakwenze & Zuberi, 148, 2013). They reinforce each other, causing a strong hold around the community. It is necessary for a new mental health policy to advocate for interventions within individuals and institutions in order to promote such an improvement in urban life. The many mechanisms that cause socio-economic disparities are outlined in great detail within the article; for example, dense and diverse populations, can  cause great stress to the individual (Anakwenze & Zuberi, 149, 2013). It requires a person to be homogenous in their frame for social networking and diversification (Anakwenze & Zuberi, 149, 2013). The advocacy for a better social policy for urban environments cannot be valued enough. The second article, titled: Grand Challenges: Integrating Mental Health Services into Priority Health Care Platfor ms highlights the necessity for integrating mental health care into global programs designed for health. This synthesizing of mental health policy into global health can have a significant impact in the lives of many individuals all across the globe (Patel et al.,1, 2013). The authors state that mental health problems are among the most frequent and disabling conditions within the planet. It is important to have everyone recognize the gravity of the situation and not take mental health lightly, because it is associated with chronic health problems that can worsen over time (Patel et al.,1, 2013). If left untreated, mental health disorders can have a significant impact on one’s self-care and can be linked to increase morbidity and mortality around the world (Patel et al.,1, 2013). Ineffective treatments can also increase the cost of healthcare and decrease productivity at work, requiring employers to cut costs and become ineffective themselves (Patel et al.,1, 2013). Knowing this, it is important to note that effective treatments for common mental health problems that plague the e ntire population can be utilized in order to help those in need (Patel et al.,1, 2013). However, current policies do not allow easy access to such treatments, therefore, reform is needed to make sure that people have access to the treatments they deserve. The authors argue for a more cohesive network for doctors and patients to communicate about mental health (Patel et al.,1, 2013). For example, there are less psychiatrists in the continent of Africa, than there are in the state of Massachusetts (Patel et al.,1, 2013). Even in developed countries such as the United States, primary care facilities are the governing parties involved in the mental health care system (Patel et al.,1, 2013). This does not allow for adequate treatment and can exacerbate problems even further (Patel et al.,1, 2013). The article states that there needs to be integration in regards to primary care facilities and mental health professionals. The next article, Service development for intellectual disability mental health: a human rights approach talks about the population  of people with intelle ctual disabilities (ID) in regards to mental health reform. The authors state that people with intellectual disabilities suffer from major mental disabilities more frequently than their peers (Evans et al., 1098, 2012). Thus, it is imperative to review the current mental health policy and if necessary, change it to better suit the growing need for people with intellectual disabilities (Evans et al., 1098, 2012). The article uses the mental health policies in Australia as an example, appraising the standards set up by the United Nations on the rights of persons with disabilities. The article demonstrates the need for an in-depth analysis on mental health care on a global scale and must understand the paradigm in which mental health policies are shaped (Evans et al., 1098, 2012). They use the human-rights framework as the perspective in which to base all mental health problems accordingly. Public mental health services must be aware of the ever growing number of patients with intellectual disabilities and plan accordingly to suit the needs of t his population (Evans et al., 1098, 2012). In order to adequately perform these services, great amounts of funding is required to create a stable environment in which to get help for mental disorders (Evans et al., 1109, 2012). This is the problem the authors face and recognize. However, they urge to apply more funding into the mental health system because mental health should be higher on the priority for the population than most would realize (Evans et al., 1109, 2012). They see it as an investment into the well-being of the community. Considering the human-rights approach, it is necessary to improve specialist services and apply better social practice foundations to help these marginalized groups (Evans et al., 1109, 2012). Mental Health Parity: Moving Closer to an Effective National Policy states that mental illness is one of the most leading causes of disabilities in North American’s between the ages of 15-44 (Hebert, 28, 2009). Even with this wide and diverse population, the problem of mental illness still goes u nrecognized in the eyes of the public (Hebert, 28, 2009). Thus, the cost of individuals and families, be it emotional, or financial, can skyrocket if left untreated (Hebert, 28, 2009). As with all the articles, the author advocates for a stronger mental health system for children and adults. They discuss the growing inequity of coverage between mental and physical health, as well as the proportion of insurance coverage in regards to mental health (Hebert,  28, 2009). Therefore, it is important to utilize every resource available to combat mental illness, and the burden should not have to be on the sufferer alone. More resources and a better capacity for understanding mental disorders must be initialized and maintained for proper care of individuals in need (Hebert, 28, 2009). Individuals with dual diagnoses of mental illness and substance abuse disorders are rampant and left untreated by the public, increasing crime and social problems nationwide. The article stresses that â€Å"mental illness is as frightening and debilitating as any major physical disorder† (Hebert, 28, 2009). Social workers and advocates for parity between the mental healthcare system and the physical healthcare system have made great strides within the last decade, however there is still much to be done (Hebert, 28, 2009). Research shows that mental health is directly related to physical health, and the equity between the two systems needs to be further enhanced in order to achieve considerable gains within the community (Hebert, 28, 2009). The article, Cultural Access and Mental Health: An Exploratory Study, talks about the rising rates of depression and other mental illnesses in regards to public concerns. The authors focus on twenty Italian regions and the relationship between health expenditures and hospital discharge rates (Crociata et al., 219, 2013). They cite that mental health disorders are growing in an exponential rate and that proper care must be maintained and development of new programs must be issued in the future (Crociata et al., 219, 2013). Well-being deprivation has been discussed in the article as one of the major causes of mental illnesses among the population (Crociata et al., 219, 2013). This increases the rates of depression and other psychological problems and can stem from factors such as poverty (Crociata et al., 219, 2013). In accordance with the title, the authors believe that culture-related programs can produce positive effects to combat these epidemics (Crociata et al., 219, 2013). Well-being deprivation, in particular, is a preventable problem that results from the lack of attention to oneself. It is important to recognize this as a growing problem and something that the public needs to be aware of in order to maximize prevention and minimize contracting other mental health problems (Crociata et al., 219, 2013). Cultural access allows for empowerment of the self (Crociata et al., 219, 2013). These can include going to concerts, or reading books, and strengthens involvement within the community or within the self. It provides a sense of who we are in this world and how we relate to others in a given timeframe (Crociata et al., 219, 2013). Being involved in these activities can stimulate the ability to take care of one’s physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Thus, advocacy is important in order to allow a greater number of people to be able to take care of themselves through cultural activities (Crociata et al., 219, 2013). Outlining the Scope of Behavioral Health Practice in Integrated Primary Care: Dispelling the Myth of the One-Trick Mental Health Pony, is an article that addresses integrated primary care practices in conjunction with mental health treatments. The authors indicate that in order to adequately prepare for all aspects of health, primary care facilities must be equipped to handle mental health problems (Miller et al., 2013). They conducted a literature review of several research articles to determine the service of behavioral health practices in regards to primary health care facilities. Depression was the most dominant screening and the most likely to be treated (Miller et al., 2013). However, many other illnesses are lacking in proper treatment by primary care facilities because they do not have the full range of services of other mental health care facilities (Miller et al., 2013). This fragmentation care between the two facilities is apparent in society, as mental health problems are still rampant and left untreated. Therefore, the best option is to have primary care facilities incorporate many of the practices of mental health care and in turn, will help those that need medical treatment (Miller et al., 2013). Allowing a collaboration between healthcare practices is empirically supported to add to the continuity of the primary healthcare system. It will enhance and create opportunities for collaboration in order to improve the prognosis of many mental health patients. It is also seen to have a boosting effect on the economy of the primary healthcare system, as more patients  will utilize these facilities more (Miller et al., 2013). If left fragmented, it will lead to higher costs and poorer outcomes and will eventually exhaust those who are willing to help mental health patients and their families (Miller et al., 2013). The authors advocate for integration and de-fragmentation of services in order to help the public. The next article, International and national policy challenges in mental health, discusses mental health in regards to the global health agenda. The global health agenda is a list of health problems that are being focused on in order to better humanity (Jenkins et al., 101, 2011). These goals are backed by several financial institutions and thus, are more likely to have better research and development against these problems (Jenkins et al., 101, 2011). However, mental health is not specified in the agenda, and therefore, are not fully funded and less likely to have results. The authors talk about the World Health Organization (WHO), along with the World Bank, as key players in the financial and global resources that entail such research (Jenkins et al., 102, 2011). They insist that not much attention is given to mental health because physical ailments such as AIDS, or influenza, take a much more precedent over mental health concerns. It is not specified at all in the priorities of the WHO and the World Bank (Jenkins et al., 102, 2011). The WHO and World Bank created Millennium Development Goals in order to have a structured itinerary on research and development against public health problems (Jenkins et al., 102, 2011). However, there are no goals specifically for the quality of mental healthcare, leaving the mental healthcare system to be on the backend of financial funding and backing by these major organizations (Jenkins et al., 102, 2011). The lack of goals presented by the WHO presents many challenges to mental health, including invisibility and marginalization of people with mental disorders (Jenkins et al., 103, 2011). This is a travesty in its’ own right because many people suffer from these disorders with no help or no treatment  available to them. The final article that I will incorporate to support my argument for a better mental health policy is titled, What kind of evidence do we need for evidence-based mental health policy? The case of the Better Access initiative. This article discusses the Better Access scheme of Australia’s commonwealth on health and aging (Allen & Jackson, 696, 2011). While being very expensive, the authors state that the new mental health policy by Australia helps many of its’ citizens by becoming one of the most significant advances of mental health policy to date (Allen & Jackson, 696, 2011). While not perfect by any means, this new policy has helped those with mental disorders attain better prognoses and a higher quality of living as opposed to the previous regime (Allen & Jackson, 696, 2011). The Better Access initiative has raised many positive evaluations from several governmental sources and while expensive, is projected to help even more in the future (Allen & Jackson, 696, 2011). The authors, who are both psychiatrists themselves and do not get money from the Better Access Initiative assess the risks and rewards of this system and weighs in on the future outcome of the new policy (Allen & Jackson, 696, 2011). In summary, they believe that this initiative is a step closer to achieving a better quality of healthcare for those with mentally disabling disorders (Allen & Jackson, 696, 2011). It is important to note that this is a somewhat new system and that there are relatively many problems, however as with any new policy, it is a step in the right direction even with the humongous financial cost to the government. Discussion: I chose the topic of mental health because there are a lack of policies towards such a large problem that affects millions of Americans. I thought that there is no substitution for quality care in regards to mental disorders and disabilities and this is indeed a heavy burden that we place upon ourselves. I am diagnosed with severe major depressive disorder and it took a long time for me to realize what I was doing was out of the norm in  society. Therefore, I have taken great care to advocate for those with mental disorders in order to ensure that they get quality care, myself included, and that we get a chance for a quality of life equitable to those without mental disorders. While major depressive disorder is common among Americans, it is important to note that cognitive behavioral therapy is only available to those who have insurance, and they need a referral to see a specialist in the matter. I know this from experience, and I am deeply saddened to know that not many people are as lucky as me when it comes to medical expenses. I am a United States Veteran, and I am subject to free healthcare services provided by the Department of Veterans Affairs. However, if it were not for this, I would not be among those who will be receiving help due to lack of monetary and financial backing. I can only imagine those people who do not receive treatment for their disorders. It is truly sad that we live in a world where families can be torn apart due to lack of healthcare and prevention, and we need to focus on this problem now rather than later. I believe that the new Affordable Care Act within the United States is a step in the right direction, however, we must be sure to maintain a strong foothold in regards to mental health. I agree with many of the articles that call for an integration between primary care and mental health facilities in order to accommodate those with mental health needs. In order to do this, a policy would need to be enacted that would combine both healthcare systems into one, with the backing of the American Medical Association among other groups. Many groups may be opposed to this scenario, as this will place a great amount of financial burden among insurance companies. However, in order to do what is right, I believe that we must make great financial sacrifices to help those in need. We need to make the changes now, rather than later to see results. I may not know much about the entire healthcare system, however, I do know that it we are morally obligated as a society to take care of those who are in need of help. Perhaps the materialistic nature of capitalism has led us astray, but I have to believe that people are generally good. If we start to  implement some of these problems as goals worldwide, we can increase the financial backing and research into solving these mental health disorders. Doing this will increase functionality of humanity as a whole, and we will be better able to tackle problems of other natures. When we look at what is at stake, it is easy to gather than many of our problems in society can be attributed to some sort of mental health problem. Crime, drug addiction, and many other factors can be controlled easily with the right treatment plan. I am not saying that this will be the cure for everything, but I do believe that if we take better care of our citizens, then we will gain greater rewards as well. Financially this will come at a great cost, but I believe the cost can be negated by the potential rewards that a new policy will bring. It is up to us to make sure that this happens, because the problem of mental health disorders will not go away if we ignore it. In fact, it will become widespread and until we can find a way to prevent or contain it, then we are only digging ourselves deeper and we will have to involve more financial backing as opposed to taking care of it in the first place. I see it as an investment to the future, because in reality, people are the future, and whether we like it or not, the more functional a person can be, the greater amount of good that she or he can give to the world. References Allen, N., & Jackson, H. (n.d.). What kind of evidence do we need for evidence-based mental health policy? The case of the Better Access initiative. Australian and New Zealand Journal of Psychiatry, 696-699. Anakwenze, U., & Zuberi, D. (2013). Mental Health and Poverty in the Inner City. Health & Social Work, 147-157. Crociata, A., Agovino, M., & Sacco, P. (2013). Cultural Access and Mental Health: An Exploratory Study. Soc Indic Res, (118), 219-233. Evans, E., Howlett, S., Kremser, T., Simpson, J., Kayess, R., & Trollor, J. (n.d.). Service development for intellectual disability mental health: A human rights approach. Journal of Intellectual Disability Research, 1098-1109. Hebert, A. (2009). Mental Health Parity: Moving Closer to an Effective National Policy. Journal of Financial Service Professionals, 63(2), 28-31. Jenkins, R., Baingana, F., Ahmad, R., McDaid, D., & Atun, R. (2011). International and national policy challenges in mental health. Mental Health in Family Medicine, 8(2), 101-114. Miller, B., Levey, S., Payne-Murphy, J., & Kwan, B. (2014). Outlining the Scope of Behavioral Health Practice in Integrated Primary Care: Dispelling the Myth of the One-Trick Mental Health Pony. Families, Systems, and Health, 32(3), 338-343. Patel, V., Belkin, G., Chockalingam, A., Cooper, J., Saxena, S., & Unà ¼tzer, J. (n.d.). Grand Challenges: Integrating Mental Health Services into Priority Health Care Platforms. PLoS Medicine, E1001448-E1001448.

Bite Me: A Love Story Chapter 1

The third book in the Love Story series, 2010 1. Hello Kitty BEING THE JOURNAL OF ABIGAIL VON NORMAL, Emergency Backup Mistress of the Greater Bay Area Night The City of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge, shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency backup mistress of the Greater Bay Area night, and my manga-haired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public. Which isn't, like, as bad as it sounds, because the general public kind of sucks ass. Still, I think that this battle of dark powers; the maintenance of my steamy, forbidden romance; the torturous break-in of a new pair of red vinyl, thigh-high Skankenstein; platform boots; as well as the daily application of complex eye makeup and whatnot, totally justify my flunking Biology 102. (Introduction to Mutilation of Preserved Marmot Cadavers, with Mr. Snavely, who totally has his way with the marmots when no one is around, I have it on good authority.) But try to tell that to the mother unit, who deserves this despair and disappointment for cursing me with her tainted and small-boobed DNA. Allow me to catch you up, s'il vous plaà ®t. Pay attention, bitches, there will be a test. Three lifetimes ago, or maybe it was like last semester, because like the song says, â€Å"time is like a river of slippery excretions when you're in love†-anyway-during winter break, Jared and I were in Walgreens looking for hypoallergenic eye makeup when we encountered the beautiful, redheaded Countess Jody and her consort of blood, my Dark Lord, the vampyre Flood, who was totally disguised in jeans and flannel as a loser. And I was all, â€Å"Nosferatu.† Whispered to Jared like a night wind through dead trees. And Jared was all, â€Å"No way, you sad, deluded little slut.† And I was all, â€Å"Shut your fetid penis port, you spunk-breathed poseur.† Which he took as a compliment, so that's how I meant it, because while Jared is deeply gay, he's never really gayed anyone up, except maybe his pet rat, Lucifer. Strictly speaking, I think Jared would be considered a rodentsexual, if not for the difficult geometry of the relationship. (See, size does matter!) Note to self: I should totally set Jared up with Mr. Snavely and they can talk about squirrel-shagging and whatnot and maybe I won't have to repeat Bio 102. Anyway, Jared is a fitting support player in the tragedy that is my life, as he dresses dismal chic and excels at brooding, self-loathing, and allergies to beauty products. I've tried to talk him into going pro. ‘Kayso, the vampyre Flood had me meet him at a club, where I offered up myself to his dark desires, which he totally rejected because of his eternal love of the Countess. So he bought me a cappuccino instead and appointed me to be their official minion. It is the duty of the minion to rent apartments, do laundry, and bring the masters a sack with a tasty kid in it, although I never did that last part because the masters don't like kids. ‘Kayso, the vampyre Flood gave me money and I rented a trs cool loft in the SOMA (which is widely accepted to be the best ‘hood for vampyres because there's mostly new buildings and no one would suspect ancient creatures of purest evil to hang out there). But it turns out, it was like half a block from the trs cool loft in the SOMA that they already lived in. ‘Kayso, when I take the key to them, hoping they will bestow the dark gift of immortality upon me, this limo full of wasted college-age guys and a painted blue ho with ginormous fake boobs pulls up. And they're all, â€Å"Where is Flood? We need to talk to Flood. And let us in,† and other demanding shit. And I'm all, â€Å"No way, step off Smurfett. There's no one named Flood here.† I know! I was all, Oh-my-fucking-zombie-jebus-on-a-pogo-stick! She was blue! And I'm not racist, so shut up. She clearly had self-esteem issues that she compensated for with giant fake boobs, slutty blue body-paint, and doing a carload full of stoners for money. I'm not judging her by the color of her skin. Everyone copes. When I got braces I went through a Hello Kitty phase that lasted well into my fifteens, and Jared maintains that I am still perky at heart, which is not true. I am simply complex. But more about the blue hooker later, because right then the Asian guy looks at his watch and says, â€Å"Too late, it's sunset.† And they drove off. Which is when I opened the door into the stairwell to the loft and was confronted by Chet, the huge shaved vampyre cat. (Except, at the time, I didn't know his name, and he was wearing a red sweater, so I didn't know he was shaved, and he wasn't a vampyre yet. But huge.) So I'm all, â€Å"Hey, kitty, go away.† And he did, leaving only William, the huge shaved cat homeless guy, lying on the steps. I thought he was dead, because of the smell, but it turns out he was only passed out from alcohol and partially drained of blood and stuff. But I'm pretty sure he's dead now because, later, Foo and I found his stank-ass clothes on the steps of the loft, full of the gray dust that people turn to when a vampyre drains them. So upstairs I'm all, â€Å"There's a dead guy and a huge kitty in a sweater on your steps.† And the Countess and Flood are all, â€Å"Whatever.† And I'm all, â€Å"And there was a limo full of stoners here who were totally hunting you.† And they were all, â€Å"Whoa.† And they seemed more freaked out than you'd think, for ancient creatures of dark forbidden romance and whatnot. And it turns out they weren't-I mean, aren't. I mean, sure, their love is eternal, and they are creatures of unspeakable evil and stuff, but they are not ancient at all. It turns out that the vampyre Flood is only like nineteen, and he's only known the Countess for like two months. And she's only like twenty-six, which, while a little crusty, is not that ancient. And despite her advanced age, the Countess is beautiful, with long, totally natch red hair and milky skin, green eyes like emerald fire, and a smoking body that could turn a girl totally lesbo if she wasn't already a slave to the mad, man-ninja sex-fu of the delicious Foo Dog. (Foo keeps insisting that he can't be a ninja because he's Chinese and ninjas are Japanese, but he's just being stubborn and goes all Angry, Angry Asian on me whenever I bring it up.) ‘Kayso, in the master's loft I see these two bronze statues, one of this crusty businessman-looking guy, and the other looks like the Countess, except it's totally naked, or in a leotard, and bronze. And I'm all, â€Å"Exhibitionist, much, Countess? Did it come with a pole?† And she's all, â€Å"Help Tommy move furniture, Wednesday.† Like that makes any sense at all. (Turns out that Wednesday is a Gothish character from some crusty movie.) ‘Kayso, later, by virtue of my extensive research and sneaking around and whatnot, I find out that the statues aren't statues at all. That the Countess used to be inside the statue of her, and that inside the crusty businessman statue is the real ancient creature of unspeakable evil, the nosferatu that turned the Countess. And the vampyre Flood, who wasn't a vampyre at all at the time, had bronzed the two of them when they were sleeping the deep sleep of the daytime dead, which is like the deepest sleep you can get. (You should know right now, that there's no yawning, gentle drift into sleepytime for vampyres. When the sun breaks the horizon, they drop rag-doll dead on the spot, and you can pose them, paint them, put their hands on their junk and post the pics on the Web, and they won't know a thing until sundown when they come on like a light and they're wondering why their naughty bits are green and their inbox is full of propositions from elfin_love.com.) I know. Whoa! It turns out that Flood, who was known as Tommy, was chosen by the Countess as her day-minion, blood lunch, and love monkey, because he worked nights at the Safeway. Then, the old vampyre, who had turned the Countess only like a week before, started fucking with them-saying he was going to kill Tommy and generally harsh Jody's reality. ‘Kayso, Flood and his stoner Safeway night crew (called the Animals) hunted down the alpha vampyre, who was sleeping in a big yacht in the Bay, and they stole like jillions in art from the yacht and blew it up with the vampyre in it, which seriously put habaneras in his ‘tude lube, but when he came out of the water, they fucked him up a good long time with spear guns and whatnot. I know! Oh-my-fucking-god-ponies-in-the-barbecue! I know! It just goes to show you, like Lord Byron says in the poem: â€Å"Given enough weed and explosives, even a creature of most sophisticated and ancient dark power can be undone by a few stoners.† I'm paraphrasing. It may have been Shelley. ‘Kayso, the Countess saves the old vampyre from being toasted, but she promises the cops (there were these two cops) to take him away and never come back to the City, but when they go to sleep, Flood, who couldn't bear to lose Jody, took them downstairs to the biker-sculptors and had them bronzed. But when he was trying to explain to the Countess about why he did it, he drilled holes in the bronze by her ears, and she turned into mist, streamed into the room, and turned him into a vampyre. Which totally surprised him, because he didn't even know she knew how to do either of those things. (Misting and turning, I mean.) So then they're like, both vampyres, eternal in their love, but somewhat lame in their night skills. Because Jody had been feeding off of Tommy, she hadn't thought through what they would eat after Tommy turned vampyre. So, first they went to this homeless guy we'll call William the Huge Cat Guy (because that's what people call him) because he used to sit on Market Street with Chet and a sign that said, I AM POOR AND MY CAT IS HUGE. And they ended up renting the huge cat, Chet, to be their shared blood lunch. But it turned out that a large part of Chet's kitty hugeness was fur, so in order to facilitate the biting process, they shaved him. I'm just glad that I wasn't their minion yet, because I think we all know who would have ended up shaving the kitty. But no! It didn't work. I'm not sure why. But William got totally, date-rape-level hammered on the liquor he bought with the huge cat rent money, and they ended up feeding on him. Which is where I, the new princess-elect of darkness, was brought into the fold. (Into the â€Å"fold† means, like, the gang, as in gang of sheep, not fold like in what you do to T-shirts if you're a casual cotton slave at Old Navy.) It was I, who turned Tommy onto the needle exchange program, where he was able to use his pale thinness to convince them he was a junkie and get syringes so they could take William's blood and put it in the fridge for the Countess to have in her coffee. Turns out that the only way the vampyre can tolerate real food or drink is if it has a little human blood in it. (The Countess likes blood on her fries, which is at once trs cool and deeply fucked-up.) So, as soon as the Countess and Flood figured out the deal with blood and food, William the Huge Cat Guy wandered off and the Countess had to go find him, since she has more experience at hunting the night, while Flood and I moved stuff from one loft to the other. But I had to get lice shampoo for my useless little sister, Ronnie, who was plagued by vermin, and Flood sent me home early to spare me the wrath of the mother unit because he didn't want his minion on restriction. (So noble. I think that's when I fell in love with him.) Then he took the bronzed old vampyre down to the water to dump him in the Bay before the Countess got back. It was clear to me that Tommy had jealousy issues with the old vampyre, and wanted to get rid of him. Except he ran out of dark before he got to the Bay and had to leave the old vampyre sitting by the Ferry Building on the Embarcadero and run from the sun for his life. At the last minute, the Animals drive by in their limo with their stupid blue ho an d scoop the vampyre Flood off the street just before he was incinerated by the sun. I know. WTF? (FYI, when I type WTF, you are supposed to read it What the Fuck? Same with OMG, and OMFG, which are Oh My God and Oh My Fucking God. Only a completely lame Disney Channel nimnode pronounces the letters. Even BMLWA, or Bite My Lily White Ass should only be spoken as letters if you are hanging out with nuns or other people who are embarrassed about being told to bite asses.) ‘Kayso, the Animals go back to work at the Safeway, but not before they tie Flood to a bed frame, where the blue hooker tortured him to get him to turn her into a vampyre, because now she had like all the money that the Animals had gotten for the old vampyre's art, which was like six hundred thousand dollars, and she wanted to take her time spending it, so she wanted to be immortal. But Flood was like a complete vamp noob. He'd never even killed anyone and turned them to dust or anything, so he didn't know how to change someone. The Countess didn't tell him that the chosen had to drink the vampyre's blood to receive the dark gift. So the blue ho tortures the shit out of him. I know, what a bitch. Meanwhile, the Countess found the huge cat guy, and I found the lice shampoo, but we don't know where Tommy is. But the Countess was burned from going out on some hot water pipes, so she fed on me, right there in the loft, and I was all, â€Å"Oh shit, I'm going to get the dark gift and I'm, like, wearing my lime-green Chuck Taylors, which are totally not the kicks for becoming a creature of unspeakable power in.† But no, the Countess just partook of my sanguine nectar so she could heal. That's probably where I fell in love with her. Anyway, she goes asking around about Tommy, and this completely crazy homeless guy who thinks he is the Emperor of San Francisco (you see him and his two dogs in the north end of the City all the time) says that one of the Animals was asking around about Flood. So I'm all, â€Å"Uh-oh.† And the Countess is all, â€Å"Yep.† Next thing you know, we are at the Marina Safeway and the Countess-wearing her black jeans and red leather jacket, but no lipstick-underhands a steel reinforced trash can like as big as a lesbian gym teacher through the big front window, and she just walks right through the falling glass, badass as shit, into the store and starts kicking stoner ass. It was glorious. But she didn't kill anyone, which turned out to be a mistake, as was, in my humble opinion, not wearing any lipstick. For while it was a heroic ass-kicking as has ever been delivered in real life, it would have been that much cooler if she had some black lipstick on, or maybe something in a dark maroon. But they told her that Tommy was tied up at Lash's, the black guy's, apartment. And their shit was all busted up, and I was like, â€Å"You bitches have been powned!† And the Countess was like, â€Å"That's cute. Let's go get Tommy.† She can be kind of a bitch sometimes. Anyway, we go to the apartment where Tommy is being held, but when we get there, he's still tied to the bed frame, but stood up against a wall, all naked and covered in blood, even his junk. And the blue ho is dead on the floor. And I'm all, â€Å"Uh-oh.† And the Countess is all, â€Å"Yep.† And she says something about how the blue ho must have broken her neck or something, because if Tommy had drained her, she would have turned to dust and there would have been no body. Anyway, the cab ride back to the loft was trs awkward, you know, with Flood naked and covered with blood and the two of them all, â€Å"Oh I love you† and, â€Å"Oh I love you, too.† And I was being kind of a mopey little emo queen because I was jealous of both of them because they had their dark and eternal love for each other and I had like my lime-green Chucks and Jared the gay-bait rat-shagger. So that was good. The rescue and whatnot. Because we found the old vampyre art money that the Animals had paid to the blue ho, which was like a half a million dollars. But then we found out that the blue ho was not dead, but somehow had accidentally drunk some of Tommy's blood when she kissed him during his torture and now she was nosferatu. And she turned all the Animals. Which, you know, was bad. And not in the good way. And the old vampyre had somehow escaped his bronze shell, and he was coming after Tommy and Jody, and even me? He even shook the living shit out of William the Huge Cat Guy while Jared and I watched from an alley across the street. I know! We were all, â€Å"Whoa?† So it's like, Christmas night, and Jared and I are watching the midnight show of The Nightmare Before Christmas at the Metreon. And we're all traumatized and whatnot from watching the vampyre pound the huge cat guy, and the Countess calls us. And she and my Dark Lord Flood meet us for coffee at this Chinese diner, which is like the only thing open because the Chinese totally blow off Christmas because there are no dragons or firecrackers in the story. Note to self: Write narrative poem exploring Christmas if the three wise men had given baby Jesus firecrackers, a dragon, and mu-shu pork instead of that other crap. So, after all night drinking coffee laced with Jared's blood and getting the story on the old vampyre from the Countess and Flood, we go back to the loft and there, in the stairway, is the old vampyre, naked. And he's all, â€Å"I had to do some laundry. That guy peed on my tracksuit.† (He was wearing a total gangsta yellow tracksuit when we saw him shaking the huge cat guy.) So we like ran, and we had to hide my masters in some rafters under the Bay Bridge when they went out at dawn. No yawning or anything-they just became dead. Well, undead. So we wrapped them in trash bags and duct tape and moved them to Jared's basement lair in Noe Valley. (His basement lair is sacrosanct-his father and stepmother are afraid that they might walk in on him wanking to gay porn-so it was safe for the masters.) Meanwhile, I went back to the loft to feed Chet the huge shaved cat and decapitate the old vampyre with Jared's dagger so I could get extra-credit points with the masters, but it turned out that I had not calculated sundown quite right. Since when does the sun go down at like five o'clock? That's just fucking juvenile. Anyway, when I'm on the steps I hear the old vampyre moving around upstairs. And I'm all, â€Å"Awkward.† Then I hear a car pull up and I run out, right into the arms of this blond ho, who it turns out is the blue ho, who is now nosferatu, along with three of her vampyre minions who used to be the Animals. I know, â€Å"Uh-oh.† So she grabs me and is just about to tear my throat out, when the old vampyre grabs her by the neck and puts her face print in the hood of a Mercedes. He's all, â€Å"You're breaking the rules, ho. You can't just go turning people willy-nilly.† So I was doing a minor booty-dance of ownage at the blond ho, when they all turned on me. So I pull out Jared's dagger, but just the same I know they are going to have a huge group suck on my pale frame, when this totally fly, race-pimped Honda comes tearing out of the alley, and everything goes white light around the car. And my manga-haired love monkey, Foo, is totally in hero shades, and he's all, â€Å"Get in.† ‘Kayso, he swept me away in his magic nerd-chariot, which he had rigged with ultraviolet floodlights that totally toasted the vamps with simulated sunlight. I know! I'd have done him right there in the car if I was not trying to maintain my detached aura of aristocratic chill. So instead I kissed him within an inch of his life, then slapped him so he didn't think I was his personal slut, which I totally was. Would be. It turns out that Steve, which is Foo Dog's day-slave name, had totally been staking out the Countess Jody's apartment for like a month, since he figured out that she was a vampyre when some blood from one of the old vamp's victims turned up in his hemo-lab at Berkeley. Foo is like some kind of biotech ber-genius, in addition to having mad ninja-driving skills. Then Foo dropped me off at Tulley's on Market, where I met Jared and Jody, who sneaked by Jared's parents by pretending to be lovers, which is disgusting in so many ways I kind of gagged a little when I typed it. (Jared is my emergency backup BFF, but he is a pervy little rat-shagger, as the Countess affectionately refers to him.) So the Countess is all, â€Å"I'm going back to the loft to get the money.† And I'm all, â€Å"No, the old vampyre.† And she is all, â€Å"He is not the boss of me.† (Or something like that. I'm paraphrasing.) And I'm all, â€Å"Whatever, make sure you feed Chet.† So we go back to Jared's, and when we get there, the vampyre Flood is all fucked up from trying to climb face-down a building in the Castro after a delicious drag queen, like Dracula does in the book (only in the book it's not in the Castro and Dracula isn't after a drag queen). Note to self: When I am finally made nosferatu, do not try to climb face-down a wall. So then my sweet love ninja Foo shows up. And he's all, â€Å"I couldn't leave you out here, unprotected.† And secretly I was all, â€Å"You rock my stripy socks, Foo,† but publically I just kissed him and tastefully dry humped his leg a little. So we all got in his fly Honda and went back to the loft. When we got there, the second-floor windows were open, and Flood could hear that the old vampyre was up there with Jody. And Foo was all, â€Å"Let me go.† And out of the hatchback, he pulls this long duster that's covered with little glass warts. And Foo is all, â€Å"UV LEDs. Like sunlight.† The street-level fire door was locked, so Flood was all, â€Å"I'll go.† But Foo was all, â€Å"No, it will burn you.† But they covered Flood all over, gloves, hat, and a gas-mask that Foo keeps around in case of emergency biology and whatnot, then he put on the duster. Foo gave him a rubber tarp and a baseball bat, and Flood starts working the street like a half-pipe, running up a building on one side, then up the other, until he goes feetfirst through the upstairs window. Personally, I think the Countess could have just jumped up there, but she's been a vampyre longer than Flood and has better skills. ‘Kayso, there's this blinding white light from the windows, and next thing we know, the old vampyre comes crashing through the window like a flaming comet and hits the street right by us. And he gets up all blackened and snarly and whatnot, and Foo holds up his UV floodlight and he's all, â€Å"Step off, vampyre scum.† And the old vampyre ran off. Then Flood comes out the door carrying the Countess, who is looking way more dead than usual, and we took them to a motel to hide them until we could figure out what to do. Foo stole some donor blood from the lab at his college and gave it to Flood and the Countess so they could heal. And Foo's all, â€Å"You know, I've been working on the blood I found on the victims, and I think I can reverse the process. I can turn you human again.† Which is totally why he had been stalking the Countess when I met him. So Tommy and Jody were all, â€Å"We'll think about it.† ‘Kayso, Flood is holding Jody on the bed, and they're talking softly, but I can hear them, because I'm just by the door and the room's not that big. And it is clear that their love is eternal and will last for eons, but Flood doesn't like being a vampyre because the hours suck and whatnot, and Jody likes being a vampyre because of the power she feels after feeling like a little wuss-girl for many years, and they more or less say that they are going to split up just as the sun rises and they go out. And I was all, â€Å"Oh, hell no.† So I had them bronzed. I'm looking at them now. We posed them like Rodin's The Kiss and they shall be together unto the end of time, or at least until we figure out how to let them out and not have them tear out our throats and whatnot. Foo says it's cruel, but the Countess told me that they could go to mist, and when they are mist time passes like a dream and it's all good. But Foo did figure out his serum thingy. We lured the Animals to our love nest and while I was wearing the fly leather jacket that Foo made me, complete with the UV LED warts, which is very cool and cyber, I drugged them and Foo changed them back to human. And the crazy old Emperor guy said he saw three young vampyres take the old vampyre and the formerly blue ho away on a ginormous yacht, so we don't have to worry about them anymore. Foo wants to cut Flood and Jody out of the bronze statue during the day, while they are sleeping, and turn them back to human. But the Countess doesn't want that. So I think we should just wait. We have this trs cool apartment, and all of the money, and Foo almost has his master's in bio-nerdism or whatever, and I only have to go home like twice a week so the mother unit still thinks I am living there. (The key was to condition her from age twelve that sleepovers are normal. Lily, my former sleepover BFF, calls it slowly boiling the frog, which I don't know what it means, but it sounds darkly mysterious.) So, we are secure in our love nest and as soon as Foo gets home I am going to reward him with the slow booty dance of forbidden love. But something is screeching outside. BRB. Fucksocks! It's Chet the huge shaved vampyre cat, down on the street. He looks bigger, and I think he ate a meter maid. Her little cart is running and there's an empty uniform on the curb. Bad kitty! GTG L8erz.

The Graduate Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1250 words

The Graduate - Essay Example The Graduate supports these arguments by ignoring all the political upheavals and concentrating on the topics of adultery and sex as the major themes of his work. The Graduate movie ignored the political movements that were taking place in the1960s. This was a time when many of the European wars were coming to an end. There were many political activists, civil rights advocates, feminist movements among others. Example of these movements included the Vietnam anti-war movements. The Graduate focuses on issues other than the political culture. It concerns with the generational gap while ignoring the counterculture movements. It attacks the film race by applying the Hollywood style; thus, causing the youth of a generation to re-examine their future by altering their course of lives. The Graduate also ignored the activist movements such as anti-racism; this indicates that the author was explicitly interested in issues of sex and adultery (Schuth 47). Dr. Benjamin argued that America had entered into a period of middle-class affluence that gave parents a chance to raise their children with greater permissiveness than before. The Graduate movie focused on the adult race. Its main focus is to criticize the adult insensitivity to the graduate. The adults are portrayed as vulgar and crass. It condemns the parents’ inability to raise their children in a pervasive way. The upper social class is portrayed as stereotyped and corrupt beyond their understanding of the meaning of true love. This is further illustrated in the movie by the character of Mrs. Robinson. When Benjamin runs away with Ms. Robinson on the wedding day, Mrs. Robinson is cross with her and openly tells her daughter that her decision is wrong. However, the love that Elaine is big enough to blind her from her mother’s arguments. This argument results in Mrs. Robinson’s slap on her daughter. On the

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Have alook at the ttachments - Essay Example Nonetheless, SMEs are defined differently from one country to another. However, most of the time, these are defined in accordance with the number of employees a business has, the turnover, and the economic scale of the business. Furthermore, electronic business (e-business or e-commerce) is defined as any type of businesses that serve or sell using the digital medium or with Information and Communication Technology (ICT). Moreover, an e-business can have three main classifications, and these are the consumer-to-consumer (C2C), the business-to-business (B2B), and the business-to-consumer (B2C) (MacGregor & Vrazalic, 2007; Khosrow-pour, 2006). In line with the globalisation, many governments suggest that SMEs incorporate e-business in order to promote advantageous economic activities (Taylor & Murphy, 2004). On the other hand, prior to integrating a business or a company with ICT, it is necessary to look over the e-economy of a country or a market. E-economy is defined by Booz, Allen, and Hamilton (2002 cited in Oliver & Sanders, 2004, p. 120) as â€Å"the dynamic system of interactions between a nation’s citizens, business, and government that capitalize upon online technology to achieve a social or economic good.† In order to guarantee readiness in the e-economy, e-readiness is being created with the following indicators: network access, network society, network economy, and network policy (Nejadirani, Behravesh, & Rasouli, 2011). Access and Usage of the ICT or Network In assessing the network, questions, such as the accessibility, the cost, and the quality of the ICT must be answered. Also, the equipment, network, and services within a given economy or market must also be determined (Nejadirani, Behravesh, & Rasouli, 2011). Furthermore, SMEs are considered as a vital part for the UK economy because almost 99% of the business enterprises in UK are SMEs with almost 60% are employed in this economy. In relation to access and usage of the network, th e most commonly used technology is the website of the company, electronic mail, and the Internet. Most of the SMEs, which had employed 10 or more staffs, had already set-up their own intranet. Also, most of these businesses had used wireless technology and electronic data interchange, which depend on the capacity and size of the SME. Furthermore, in the process of automated record-keeping of sales and orders, most of the SMEs use ICT accounting and finance activities. Moreover, the automation of business designs, enterprise resources planning, human resource management tasks, and the production control was also used by SMEs. The shift to the usage of ICT of SMEs has been due to the efficiency that the automation results to, the highly technologised competition in the market, and in order to enhance customer service and employee satisfaction (Dyerson, Harindranath, & Barnes, 2008a). Furthermore, in relation to skills needed in the usage or integration of ICT to SMEs, technical skills are not enough. The ICT department or staff must also have excellent communication skills and customer service skills. Also, the ICT staff must be capable of transferring theories into knowledge that can be sued in practice (Lowry & Turner, 2007). Network in the Society In this aspect, a

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What do you understand by the term epistemology How can different epistemological understandings influence choice of research method - Essay Example Epistemology seeks to explore or evaluate how knowledge is acquired, how much knowledge is understood, and knowledge is constructed within the realms of human mind. Epistemology tries to explain the relationship between depth of human understanding about a particular subject and the reliability of that understanding. It seeks to answer the question how what is known can be measured. Research aims at analyzing objects of nature in order to come up with a helpful conclusion. The researcher is thus at the discretion of using personal beliefs, understanding, and justification to influence the outcome of the research findings. A report by University of Oulu claims that the researcher is in a position to â€Å"influence directly only the epistemological basis of the research, not the evaluator’s bias, but of course clear criteria stated by the researcher makes it more valid for the reader to evaluate the trustworthiness of the research† (University of Oulu, 2003, p. 1). Seale echoes the same sentiments â€Å"it is true that certain epistemological and theoretical positions have influenced the character of both quantitative and qualitative research† (Seale, 2004 p. 506). Truthfulness of research is very important especially in the field of public health. For instance, I intend to use Quantitative analysis for my dissertation that aims at investigating public’s awareness of thalassemia syndromes in Jordans Capital – Amman. The study will collect information in form of questionnaires. Certainly, the questionnaires will be a reflection of my epistemological foundation. The questions will be formulated based on understanding of the topic. Although a lot of work on literature review will be done, interpretation of the literature work will depend on two main factors. First, it will depend on the line of thought of authors of the literature that I will review. Secondly, it will depend on my own interpretation of the literature work, which in turn will depend on personal

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Value of Planning in the Urban Development - Essay Example Traditionally, planning concentrated on improving the physical conditions of the houses and streets with response to prevailing circumstances whereby this contrasted with the new aspects of urban planning. City planning process is highly a complex matter, as it must put into account characteristics together with the long-range welfare of people of that particular urban area or city (Barney, 2006). It follows a systematic process that involves series of studies and surveys, land-use development plan, transportation system plan, budget preparation, not forgetting that it has to receive a unified master plan approval from several agencies or legislative bodies. The history of urban development is a controversial subject in the States. Many planners at the beginning of 19th century used to consider total costs of urban planning as opposed to its benefits and this drew a very different picture. However, as time went by, urban community planning took a turning point with a progressive approach where planners concentrated on maximizing the difference between costs and benefits and did not necessarily consider minimizing costs. This was in response to the fact that minimizing costs and at the same time minimizing benefits was of no value, not to the planners nor the country. The history of America reveals that American cities increased and expanded in the early decades of the 19th century. Due to their expansion, geography born rise to city planning as most of the vital roads by then existed for two centuries earlier. As a result, they winded up in erratic areas in local ways and around topographic areas. Afterward, the presence of equipment for construction permitted straighter roads hence planners persisted in establishing a good framework for developing the urban community transportation network (Weiner, 2008).